I am more than slightly uncomfortable with the fact that Dr. Laura is the new spokesperson for stay at home moms. Her traditional value system and outdated theories certainly don’t represent me as a stay at home mom.
But with that said, I am glad that someone is speaking to and about stay at home moms. I have said before that I feel very fortunate to be in the position to stay at home with my kids and I do, but it was a choice that we made for our family because we felt that was what was best for our family.
This was a very significant sacrifice for us and we struggled financially for a long time. But with careful planning, stategic budgeting and a lot of self control, we have been able to not only survive, but thrive in our situation. Karli has worked so hard to advance his carreer so that we can build our life and provide for our kids.
And now that the kids are getting a little older there is an opportunity for me to remake myself professionally as well. I put my career on hold to stay at home and it is undeniable that I would have been very successful by now in that career. But, that doesn’t mean that I can never work or build a new career for myself. It just looks a little different now and for me that is the best thing that could have happened. I feel like I am going to get my cake and eat it too – a professional life that fits my lifestyle and the family life that we have chosen to build for ourselves.
Choosing to stay home has been the most rewarding and challenging thing I have ever done. It isn’t easy and I am certainly not lazy or stupid. I have heard that this is a common perception, but I have never experienced that. I work very hard and give of myself on an emotional level that I think is hard to understand or relate to unless you do stay at home. But I also reap the biggest rewards and I think my kids do as well.
But, I also don’t think it is productive to perpetuate the divide between stay at home and working moms. We all work very hard to care for our children in the way that works best for our families. My closest girl friends work outside the home and I have a great deal of respect for them and there choices just as they have respect for mine.
We often joke that we couldn’t imagine how hard it must be to do it the other way around and I think that says that we have made the right choices for us. Moms should support and respect each other, no matter what our circumstances are.
On somewhat of a side note…
A while back my step sister in law (is that the way I say it?) posted the article below on facebook. I felt this was a pretty good representation and until now forgot how much I wanted to share this with you all. Now seems like an appropriate time. Click on the image to make it big enough to read.
For this reading I will be using the I-X of Coins. These cards deal with all things related to money.
To select that card that represents my relationship with money we will add up the letters in the first and last name. A = 1 Z = 26 and all in between as you might presume.
I am going to do both my married and maiden names to get a full picture.
11+1+18+9+14 = 53 = 8
18+5+5+3+5 = 36 = 9
8+9 = 17 = 8
11+1+18+9+14 = 53 = 8
7+1+12+12+1+3+8+5+18 = 67 = 13 = 4
8+4 = 12 = 3
VIII Coins: Your money will come from the mastering of a profession, which will provide you a nice living. You spend your life perfecting your craft and will be rewarded for it. You do well with money and could make the making of money your craft.
III Coins: Your money will likely originate from others but you work very hard for it. You may be involved in a field where you require creative funding to finance your pursuits. This could include grants, stipends, freelancing or income from your family or patron of some sort. You contribute greatly to those who fund you and they are happy to do it.
VIII of Coins
My Take: This card brings up imagery of a clock maker. A mad works on an intricate piece of machinery, carefully adding each piece in its place. There are shelves of books in the background indicating someone well studies. This card makes me think of mastery of a craft.
The Card: This card involves labor intensive projects requiring slow and steady work. This is not time for hasty decisions or quick movements. Buckle down and do the work. The plans on the table indicate that he is not yet an expert in his field. He should look to the books behind him and his tarot deck for guidance.
III of Coins
My Take: The man in this picture appears to be blowing glass. He is an artisan and a free spirit.
The Card: This man has mastered his craft. The creation of art from raw materials.
This reading makes some sense I guess. I am a kept woman after all (hee hee). No really, although I have had a traditional career (or at least the start of one), it was never where my heart lie. I have always known that I would spend my life learning and continuing to master some skill. At this point what that is just appears to be illusive. I have always wanted to get my PhD and become a professor. I also love Yoga and think often about teaching, talk about a lifetime of mastering. Now, i just need to learn to get over my self doubt long enough to pick something, maybe neither of these are it, but something, I just need to find it and then commit. Whoo, scary.