I thought I was going to have a heart attack. My head was spinning and this high pitched sound came out of my mouth.
I immediately grabbed the roll of paper towels and started blotting. The phone was sitting right there, so I called Karli to help me look up what to do. I was afraid to stop blotting long enough to look up how to clean it.
Now, I knew that the microfiber was easy to clean. That’s one of the reasons we went that way. With kids, there always seems to be some small smear of something or other littering the couch cushions. These wipe away with a damp sponge in just a couple of seconds. But a whole cup of coffee? I was sure we were doomed.
There was lots of advice available very easily online. What we found is that microfiber can be cleaned with almost anything. But Karli found a great little trick and I actually remember somebody telling me this also. Wet Wipes. Who woulda thunk it?
Worked like a charm. The stain is completely gone, like it never was there in the first place. My only concern now is with the cushion underneath. There is a faint smell of coffee surrounding the couch, but that will fade I’m sure. Right?
The cushion cover unzips, but I am worried I won’t be able to get the cushion back in right and I am also not sure what I would do when I got there. Maybe when I am done writing this, I will take a closer look.
I know that this wasn’t really his fault. I definitely shouldn’t have left a cup of coffee anywhere he could reach it. But at what point is this kind of thing going to slow down. I know it won’t stop for a long while, but I feel like all I do is chase after him from one thing he knows he’s not supposed to do to another. When does just a little bit of impulse control kick in?
He knows what he is doing is wrong. He runs runs away as soon as he sees me coming and knows to wait until I leave the room before doing these things. He has a set of them: the phone, the remotes, any food or drink available, the puzzle/game cabinet, my china cabinet, the computer, my laptop, grabbing anything he can reach off the counter etc. I do the best I can to cover all my bases and watch him as closely as I can, but sometimes you have to pee or wash a dish or answer the phone or make lunch.
I have put up gates everywhere I can and the tops of anything high I own are overflowing with stuff I have tried to get out of the way.
It all just makes me so tired. I am definitely ready for whatever the next stage is because this one is getting old. It was hard to see past it to the cuteness today, which is usually my way back.
Of course, when one is not themselves and needs extra attention the other puts it into high gear. In this case, my daughter has become combative and argumentative and generally just pissed off at the world.
The two of them combined was threatening to push me straight over the edge.
This is all perfectly normal of course, but sometimes you can’t help but feel like the world is closing in around you and you are all alone in the world. That you must be doing something wrong and that no one could possibly understand what you are going through.
It’s also amazing how exactly what you need comes to you just when you need it. This behavioral chaos that has invaded our home was coming to its peak the last couple of days and I started looking around and reaching out a little.
The kind and commiserating words of friends, a forum thread I found yesterday and similar developmental information from various sources convinced me that I just needed to let it go and relax. My goal for the rest of the day was to simply stay calm.
Of course, this didn’t mean that he wasn’t frustrated or getting into everything or being a general menace, but my attitude toward it started to change and he seemed calmer as well. After his nap, he was running around pointing and saying the name of everything. This is a huge step as he has been a little slow to expand his vocabulary past the basics.
Then this morning, he’s like a brand new kid. Or really, just more like his old self with an expanded vocabulary. I had a feeling that this was one of those ‘disequalibrium’ stages that happen before a huge development shift, but is it possible that like a switch his words kicked in and the never ending bad attitude is out? Just like that? I’m tentatively and realistically hopeful.
And just to remember all the joy they bring us, click on the first photo below for slide show.
I promise I cook more than these wacky on a whim recipes, but they seem fun to share and I’m not going to share all my best stuff, gotta come to dinner for the really good stuff. Who knows, someday I may want to write a cookbook.
Ooey Gooey Mexi Casserole
6 servings
- 2 c. cooked brown rice
- 2 T light ranch dressing
- 1/4 c fat free sour cream
- 1 can fat free refried beans
- 1 can diced green chilies
- 1/2 lb pork loin roast
- 3 T taco seasoning
- 2/3 cup enchilada sauce
- 3/4 cup cheddar cheese, shredded
While the rice is cooking, prepare taco meat. See my taco seasoning recipe for guidance if you need it.
Spread the rice on the bottom of a baking dish.
Mix the ranch dressing and sour cream together and then spread over the rice. It will be a very thin layer.
This recipe will repeat the spread this out over… routine several times and sometimes it is easier said than done. I find that if I spoon out small spoonfuls out across the pan and then squish down or spread as best I can that it works out just fine. With this dish it simply just doesn’t make much difference how pretty it looks because it isn’t really going to hold its form very well out of the pan anyway.
Spread the refried beans over the rice and sour cream mix.
Sprinkle/spread the green chilies
Spread out the taco meat
Pour the enchilada sauce over the top and sprinkle with cheese.
Bake at 375F for 30 minutes or so until heated through. It may bubble around the edges, but also may not, depending on what size of pan you use and how the sauce gets distributed.
Nutritional Information
I discovered many women there discussing important issues and sharing their voices. I have contributed to these conversations on several occasions and was looking through my posts there the other day. I found an old comment I left on a thread about doulas and felt like this may be an important story to share here.
This is my birth story. Giving birth is one of the most rewarding and empowering things we can do as women. But this story also reminded me how important it is to remember that it is our inner power that gives us the strength to complete such a wonderful and trying journey.
We must always remember to nourish this inner strength so that we remain these incredibly powerful women throughout the rest of our lives. Raising great kids is going to take all the energy, courage and fortitude we can get our hands on.
Please excuse any spelling or grammer errors in the story below. It was written in haste and without editing.
With and Without a Doula
I have had two completely different birthing experiences, one with a doula and one without.
The birth of my daughter was one of the most tramatic experiences of my life. For my entire prenatal period, I had a doctor that I loved and we had a very detailed plan that we had worked out together for months. Unfortunately, nothing would go as planned.
This is a good lesson in itself. No matter how well you plan, be just as prepared for nothing to go the way you think it will.
The thing is, when you go to a doctor that is part of a group, the chances that that doctor will deliver your baby is very low, unless you go into labor during office hours. I’m sure this has worked out fine for many women but for me, it was the middle of the night both times.
The doctor that was on call when I went into labor with my daughter was really unfortunate. My water had broke and labor was slow to start. I had had my appendix out six weeks earlier (yeah, 34 weeks pregnant and a totally different story) and she basically told me that I was high risk and would be treated as such, even though my doctor had told me as long as I had gone six weeks past surgery, I would be considered normal.
What this meant is that I was monitored the whole time and she only gave me a short period for labor to begin before she gave me pitocin. I just felt rushed and unsupported by her for my entire labor. I felt like she was just chomping at the bit to cut me open, not the most nurturing birthing environment.
My doula was very good at keeping me as calm as possible through this whole thing and keeping me informed of what was going on and why certain decisions were being made, but my anxiety level was very high and the pitocin contractions were extremely painful.
The short version of the story is that eventually, during pushing, my daughter started to dcell and then they lost her heartbeat. Then there was panic and rushing around and throwing of scrubs and I was screaming, it was terrible. When we got to the operating room, they hooked her up to the monitor and she was totally fine, but the doctor insisted on continuing with the c-section. While they were upping my epidural to the correct levels, I continued to push (as you can’t stop), with the help of my nurse and eventually, I took control and demanded that she let me try to push her out before she proceeds with the c-section as she was fully crowning and her heartrate was fine. She gave me three pushes and I was luckily able to push her out. The whole operating room broke out in cheers.
Although having a doula was a nice additive to my experience, she was not allowed in the operating room and was able to do little to prevent my bad experience. I am in no way saying that doulas can’t be a great help and I felt like my doula did a great job given the circumstances, but when it comes down to it, it is all about your own sense of power and peace and the relationship with your doctor.
I also give a ton of credit to my nurse. She was amazing and stayed with me through the end, even though her shift had ended. She empowered me and from working with that doctor (who it was pretty clear that most of the nurses didn’t like working with) many times before, she was knowledgable about how to deal with this doctor and helped me to get what I needed in spite of her.
In the end, my daughters birth was very empowering and she was healthy and beautiful and that is all the really matters.
When I got pregnant with my son, I took a totally different approach. I was determined that if I had anything to say about it, that doctor was never going to come anywhere near me again. Unfortunately, this meant that I had to leave my doctor, who I totally loved.
Having several experiences in the maternity ward at my hospital (my daughter’s birth and I spent a week there after my apendix operation), I was confident with the nursing care and quality of the facility.
For me, it really came down to finding the right practice. All the doctors in the practice must be on the same page as you when it comes to your needs during labor. With a group of doctors who share on call duties, you will never be sure of what doctor will be there to deliver your baby.
I was fortunate that I found a doctor I trusted and who would for sure deliver my baby the second time around. He has an individual practice and delivers 97% of his own babies. He goes on vacation once a year and as long as you aren’t due during that time, you can almost be certain he will be there with you.
My first birth was so dramatic and stressful that the second time, I just wanted calm. I wanted to enjoy the birthing experience and embrace motherhood in a way that I was denied the last time. I did end up choosing an epidural, but was not pressured or deterred in any way. This time around the decisions were mine, with the understanding that if things got really bad, he would have to take over. That I could live with.
I am very narrow through my pelvis and my babies are big and therefore, they have a little trauma coming through the birth canal. My son’s birth was no different in this matter, but I didn’t even really know anything was wrong. My doctor was calm and cool through the whole thing and found the perfect balance of telling me this was serious and I had to push with no resting, without making me feel scared at all.
My son was born healthy, happy, huge and in a hurry.
I am so glad that I have that experience as the freshest and most prominent in my mind.
I agree that birth done the wrong way can be increadibly tramatic and with lasting effects. I was so jumpy and scared going into it the second time.
But, I am glad that I took charge of my pregnancy and birthing experience and did what I needed to make sure I wasn’t in the same situation again.
My advice, find a doctor you trust in a practice that as a whole gels with your belief system and what you desire from your delivery. Take every opportunity you can to meet with as many of the doctors in the practice as you can and also make sure that the hospital you are going to has practices and rules that you agree with and a top notch nursing staff. If having your plan followed through on and your doctor there with you, then do your best to choose someone who delivers a very high percentage of their babies.
Ask questions, be up front with what you need and don’t be afraid to change course if necessary.
As far as doula’s go, after having one with me the first time, I didn’t feel it was necessary the second time. But, my husband was amazing during labor and I was confident enough the second time to be my own advocate and I trusted my doctor implicitly.
I think every birth and every individual is completely unique and doula’s can be an excellent resourse and a great help.
The Redesigned Mom
A Stay at Home Mom’s Journey to Self Fulfillment
Submitted by redesignedmom on Sat, 10/04/2008 – 14:40
You see, I pass out. I pass out when I hurt myself. I pass out when other people hurt themselves. I pass out when people on TV hurt themselves (no ER – the TV show – for me). I pass out when other people talk about hurting themselves. I pass out when I work too hard and eat too little. I even pass out for no apparent reason.
It is some function of my low blood pressure, I think. I don’t really know. I am definately going to bring it up with my therapist and my doctor though because after yesterday, I need to do something.
Because of this, my worst fear as a parent is that something will happen to my kids and I won’t be able to help them.
And this fear is not unjustified. I have been lucky up until now that there has been someone there to help me.
But yesterday, I was all by myself.
I am not going to go into details about what happened because it just isn’t important to this story. The short of it was that he hurt himself badly enough that I felt we needed to go to the ER and that he is just fine. An x-ray and an ace bandage and he acts like nothing ever happened. While he flirted with nurses, I quietly tried to calm myself and fight back the tears.
But I did it. All by myself, without anyone to help me and without actually losing conciousness. I did have to pull the car over once to avoid passing out and wrecking the car, but we got there.
I called Karli right after it happened and he left work immediately to meet me at the hospital. I can’t even tell you how much I needed him right then. I just kept telling myself that he would be there soon and I just had to make it a few more minutes. Little did I know that he was stuck in traffic and wouldn’t arrive until we were leaving the hospital two hours later. There was no phone service in the hospital so I wasn’t getting his calls and couldn’t send a text message. I can’t imaging sitting in traffic, not knowing what was going on. He was so scared.
But, the fact that it took him two hours to go a distance it should have taken him no more than 45 minutes to go in the worst traffic confirms that I was meant to go this one alone.
Although I think I passed the test, this was minor and there was no blood. I can’t help but think what might have happened if…
What I do know is that it is time for me to figure out why I do this and try to fix it if I can.
The work never stops or even takes a break, huh?
this very cool new product was highlighted.
Now, I haven’t tried it, but since I am such an advocate of making your own baby food and I thought this was something I would have loved to have, I just had to mention it. It is simply a very innovative and mention worthy new product. I love it when people think outside the box.
The Beaba Babycook Baby Food Maker
What’s different about this one is that you can put the food in and steam it and then when it is finished cooking, turn the blender on and blend it to the desired consistency right in the same container. You can also use it to defrost or warm the baby food when your done.
The one thing that stands out as a flaw in this product is the small bowl size (2.5 cups) If you wanted to make big batches to freeze, this could be a hinderance. But, if Super Baby Food
More Baby Puree Recipe Books
I don’t worry terribly about the amount of fat my kids intake in a meal like this, because they are light eaters and eat a pretty healthy, well balanced diet so a little fat is still good for them and these meatballs are very tasty the way they are. But, if it looks a little fatty for you or your kids, then I would suggest cutting the sausage in half and upping the amount of lean meat. I wouldn’t suggest cutting the sausage all together though as it is integral to the flavor and really what makes them so palatable for the kids.
This is a good sized recipe and will make 20-40 meatballs, depending on size. This is the best part though. After cooking them, lay them out on a cookie sheet in a single layer and put them in the freezer for an hour to overnight and then put all the little meatballs in a gallon freezer bag. You can then take out the desired amount and heat them in the microwave. 30 seconds on high, turn, then another 30 seconds on high.
This is best made using a food processor
Hide-a-Veggie Meatball Recipe
1 lb. Very lean ground beef or ground turkey (both are equally good)
1 lb. ground pork sausage
1 medium zucchini, cut into chunks
2 medium carrots or 2 handfuls of baby carrots, cut into chunks
1 small onion, cut into chunks (about 1/2 cup or so)
2 cloves of garlic
2 slices of whole wheat bread (or any other kind of bread), regular sized slices not large – adjust for larger slices.
1 egg
1 t dry Italian seasoning (or a smidge each of oregan0, basil, thyme and/or rosemary, whatever you have is totally fine)
1/2 t salt
1/4 t pepper
Put everything but the meat into the food processor and blend until very small bits, but not too much. Add the meat and mix until everything is well incorporated.
Pinch off small balls, roll them a little in your palm and place them in a large frying pan (oven safe only) in a single layer. Depending on how big of pan you have, you may have to do two batches.
Preheat the oven to 400F
Place the pan over medium heat and cook the meatballs until they are nicely browned on one side. Turn each meatball over using a pair of
tongs
and brown on the other side.
Take the pan and place it in the oven. Bake the meatballs until they are cooked through, about 10 minutes.
Remove and serve.
Remember to freeze any leftovers for an easy quick meal at a later time.
If you don’t have a food processor
The carrots, onions, garlic and zucchini need to be shredded and then use a knife to cut those shreds as small as you can. Use dried bread crumbs instead of the bread slices, about 1 cup.
Add all the ingredients in the bowl and then mix well with your hands.
Proceed as stated above.
Nutritional Information - Full Version
Nutritional Information – Light Version
Note: Although the total fat and saturated fat is significantly lower in the light version, the grade didn’t change. hmmm.
I just love this photo. It makes my heart melt a little to think about these kids growing up vacationing together. Excuse my sappiness, but this is what it is all about, building those unforgettable memories with others you truly care about.
Well, lately he has been wanting to sit on the potty whenever he gets out of the tub. He is also a total menace in the bathroom and he is getting old enough that the bathroom can’t just simply be off limits so I needed something to distract him away from all the no nos in the bathroom.
The worst is the toilet brush. Those brushes are nasty and I really wish there was some alternative. I have been looking, but haven’t really found a suitable alternative. I am going to start using baking soda and vinegar and see how it goes though because I just read way too much on the chemicals in toilet cleaners.
Oh yeah, Ian and the potty.
I decided that I would buy him his own little potty. I put it in the bathroom and now he has something to do and concentrate on rather than the nasty toilet brush and flip up garbage can. It has been working like a charm for the last two days. Karli even got a great pic of him brushing his teeth on the potty this afternoon.
I wasn’t really thinking about him actually using the potty. He’s very little still after all. But, tonight after his bath, he climbed out of the tub and went right over to his potty and sat down and refused to get up. So, I sat down and started talking to him about using the potty and how if he needed to go potty, he could point it down and just go.
After a few minutes I was ready to move on and trying to distract him with all sorts of talk of milk and stories and jammies. I finally coaxed him off the potty and lo and behold, there it was. A significant puddle. Frenzy ensues. Karli ran to get a bite of brownie from the kitchen (they get a treat for using the potty, right?) and I wrapped him in his towel and smothered him with kisses and praise.
Ahh, there is a light. He will eventually grow up and learn to do things for himself. He will eventually learn how to follow some rules and take to some structure.
A pretty cool moment, I have to say.
But, they are just the cutest damn thing you have ever seen. How he snuggles into my lap and takes my hand and rubs his head just how he likes it. How she looks at me with those big blue eye and demands milk and then catches herself ”Can I please have some milk mama?”, she says with a sly smile. How he spins around until he falls down and jumps up and down with the imagination movers. How she is so proud of her extraordinary coloring skills. How he curls up with Pella in the giant new dog bed. How she scrunches up on the couch in the morning, her little bum sticking right up in the air.
I could go on and on and on and on. They have this very special way of driving you crazy and melting your heart at the same time. These are the times when I realize how much I love this job.