I am so angry.

I am not sure I have ever been so angry.

My body is one big knot.  Each day, I wake with a new knotted up muscles.  Today it is in my right shoulder.  Yesterday it was on the left side of my neck.

Yoga last night helped temperarly.  My yoga bliss was a much needed reprieve, even if it only lasted  a couple of hours.  Today, the anger is back in full force.

I can feel it when I breathe, a hallow dullness in my chest, a slight dizziness, my head light, my thoughts muddied.

The tears come at the most inopportune times, when I most need them to stay stuffed down.  I teeter on the edge of control, trying to put on a happy face and keep moving for the sake of my family and many times not too successful.  My poor husband, I’m sorry.

This is a lesson in fear and weakness.  Do not let things build up without saying anything.  Years worth of frustration and bitterness are very hard to deal with all at once.

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