The Redesigned Mom

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This week’s selections are rather eclectic.  My moods and influences have been varied and inconsistent this week and I think this is reflected here.  

The list starts with one of my favorite songs by one of my favorite bands.  If you haven’t seen Barenaked Ladies live and get the opportunity to, you must.  They are one of those rare bands that are better live than on their albums.  Karli and I were discussing that Jason Mraz is like this too.  Karli just saw Mraz last weekend and said it was amazing.  Artists that can really connect with the audience make for the best shows.

I love the song Grade 9 because these guys are similar in age to me and it reminds me so much of what that time in my life was like.  You can’t help but laugh out loud some of the references.  I think everyone of our generation fondly remembers that conclusion of every school dance and the haunting sounds of Stairway to Heaven. Oh heck, I’ve added Stairway to Heaven just for good measure.

Back when I worked for RealNetworks, they purchased the company that originated the Rhapsody service.  As a result we all received free memberships and I loved it so much I started paying for it when I left.  I even upgraded to the “to go” service so I can endlessly load up my MP3 player.  The point of that little ramble is to say that I have a custom radio station that I listen to all the time and in addition to bringing up some of my favorite songs from times past, it also helps me to discover new music as well.  Can you tell I love this service, it is the best, really.

Anyway,  this week I discovered an artist that I hadn’t listened to before that I find rather intriguing and will definitely get a good listening to from this song writer aficionado.  I have included Tony Lucca’s song Darlin’ I as this is the song that I first heard on my radio station and what inspired me to listen to more.   I am looking forward to hearing more of what he has to offer.

Another song to note on this list is Trick Daddy’s Sugar.  Although I don’t immediately turn to rap for my musical fix, my friend Matt put this on Saturday night and I have to say that this is a kick ass song.  Definitely on my list of favorite Rap songs, although as you can imagine this list isn’t incredibly lengthy.

The rest fall into old favorites that came across the wireless network to my TV and out through my stereo speakers.  Did I mention you can get Rhapsody through your Tivo service (I know, I will stop with the sales pitch, old habits die hard and good products deserve promotion).  

Enjoy this weeks selections and the fond memories of younger days.

Well, the living room is almost complete. All the furniture has arrived and we have moved most things in. We still need to accessorize, but wanted to live in the space for a while before we did too much. I need a couple of house plants, some throws and pillows and a new rug, but that will probably have to wait for a while.

I absolutely love the couches and having enough seating has made all the difference in the world to us. Having guests is now enjoyable, with seating for 6 or 7 comfortably.

We mounted the TV above the fireplace and I was a little concerned that it would be too high, but I really like it and we got one of those full motion mounts and I love it. It’s really stable and moves to be viewable from all over the room. The only downfall has been having to change the side of the table we eat at. Like the side of the bed you sleep on, you get attached.

Below are some photos of the process. We didn’t really catch the disaster that was our living room in its full glory, but it’ll do.  

Click on a photo to see slideshow.

I just built a new page with some really cool logic puzzle widgets. You can play these puzzles (several sudoku and picture puzzle variants) right from this site and they are updated daily or weekly, depending on the puzzle. Full instructions and rules are included with each puzzle.

Why would I do this you ask? Basically so that I can play a quick puzzle when I need to clear my head a little and since I am usually working on this site or another in some way, it seemed like an easy way to go about it.

I also hope that you may have some fun with them as well.

Check it out Now!

Last night the most horrific thing happened.  I still can’t believe it was real, that he is really gone, that it all happened the way that it did.  I don’t really know if I am even ready to tell the story.  I have been spending most of my time trying to pretend it didn’t happen or not to think about it too much as too avoid the return of the shock and horror.

Ok, I am going to give it a go…

Last night, Matt and Teresa came over for dinner as they do almost every weekend and for the duration of the evening, we ate and talked and laughed and carried on as we usually do.  Around 11:30 they left and Karli and I prepared to go to bed.  Karli went to call in the cats as he usually does before bed and he called me to the door. 

There was a coyote standing in the middle of the road under the street lamp.  Wow, I don’t know if I can do this…

We watched the coyote in awe, we couldn’t figure out what he was doing.  He would come to the shadows of our yard and then run across the street again.  Then one time he left our yard he carried the limp body of our dear Henry across the street and up the culdesac across from us.  

We just stood there, what the hell just happened.  Did we really just see that?  Was it really Henry?  And then it gets worse.  We can see the coyote in the road across the street and he is eating my cat.

We were torn and paralyzed.  Do we chase him off?   Do we really want to see our little Henry that way?  Eventually, Karli took a shovel and went out to take a closer look and yes it was Henry, but he was completely gutted and Karli couldn’t bring himself to get any closer.  

I can’t really describe to you how we felt at this moment.  We were frozen.  Then I was terrified for Oscar.  He still hadn’t come home.  I didn’t feel like I could just leave him out there.  We came inside to think for a minute and after a few minutes, we looked outside and coyote had come and taken Henry out of the street and off into the woods.  Maybe better that way?

Now it’s almost one in the morning.  What do we do?  I just laid there in bed and stared at the ceiling, my stomach churning.  Neither one of us has really knows how to feel and is somewhat alarmed and concerned about the lack of tears and deep sadness.

I almost wonder if it has something to do with the abrupt and shocking instant closure.  There was no wondering or worrying or trips to the vet.  It just was what it was.  Shocking, horrifying and so terribly awful that there is little left to feel.

We also struggle with what to tell Ada.  Henry stayed pretty clear of the kids, preferring our company to that of high energy and grabby though gentle kids.  I also didn’t really trust him with them as he has been known to get aggressive if he doesn’t like what you are doing so I didn’t encourage them with him the same way I did with Oscar and Pella.  So, she hasn’t asked about him or for him.  I don’t know how to handle this.  Do I say something now or wait for her to ask about him?  What story do I tell her?  Some toned down version of the truth I think is best, but is it better just to leave it be unless she asks?  I really just don’t know right now.

Our Henry was a wonderful cat.  He was our first pet together and was with us for over 12 years.  He loved to snuggle and was so happy for the love that he would forget to swallow and end up drooling all over you.  He slept right between us each night and couldn’t wait for someone to sit down so he could claim your lap as his own.   He had this way of smiling all the way to his eyes.  Henry and Karli had a great bond and he was really Karli’s cat in the way that pets usually choose one to attach to.  We miss him so much.

Click on the thumbnails below for full size images.

Goodbye my sweet boy.

This reading will address the role that money plays in my life.  It is a numerology reading using the Coins cards.

The Setup

For this reading I will be using the I-X of Coins.  These cards deal with all things related to money.

To select that card that represents my relationship with money we will add up the letters in the first and last name.  A = 1 Z = 26 and all in between as you might presume.

I am going to do both my married and maiden names to get a full picture.

Karin Reece
11+1+18+9+14 = 53 = 8
18+5+5+3+5 = 36 = 9
8+9 = 17 = 8

Karin Gallacher
11+1+18+9+14 = 53 = 8
7+1+12+12+1+3+8+5+18 = 67 = 13 = 4
8+4 = 12 = 3

The Answer

VIII Coins: Your money will come from the mastering of a profession, which will provide you a nice living. You spend your life perfecting your craft and will be rewarded for it. You do well with money and could make the making of money your craft.

III Coins: Your money will likely originate from others but you work very hard for it. You may be involved in a field where you require creative funding to finance your pursuits. This could include grants, stipends, freelancing or income from your family or patron of some sort. You contribute greatly to those who fund you and they are happy to do it.

The Cards

VIII of Coins

My Take: This card brings up imagery of a clock maker. A mad works on an intricate piece of machinery, carefully adding each piece in its place. There are shelves of books in the background indicating someone well studies. This card makes me think of mastery of a craft.

The Card: This card involves labor intensive projects requiring slow and steady work. This is not time for hasty decisions or quick movements. Buckle down and do the work. The plans on the table indicate that he is not yet an expert in his field. He should look to the books behind him and his tarot deck for guidance.

III of Coins

My Take: The man in this picture appears to be blowing glass. He is an artisan and a free spirit.

The Card: This man has mastered his craft. The creation of art from raw materials.

Reading Analysis

This reading makes some sense I guess. I am a kept woman after all (hee hee). No really, although I have had a traditional career (or at least the start of one), it was never where my heart lie. I have always known that I would spend my life learning and continuing to master some skill. At this point what that is just appears to be illusive. I have always wanted to get my PhD and become a professor. I also love Yoga and think often about teaching, talk about a lifetime of mastering. Now, i just need to learn to get over my self doubt long enough to pick something, maybe neither of these are it, but something, I just need to find it and then commit. Whoo, scary.

It’s so exciting!  Karli and I took Ian down to our local elementary school after dropping Ada at school this morning and proudly voted for Obama as well as many state and local issues. 

There weren’t any lines or crowds as we live in a small town (well actually a very small incorporated seattle suburb) with adequate polling locations and the majority of folks in our county vote absentee.  In fact, they are making us all vote absentee as soon as they can get the system in place.

I have probably said this before, but I think this is really unfortunate.  There is something empowering and inspiring about going to polls and making your voice heard along with others in your community.  It just seems more impactful in some way. 

But today is about anticipation and excitement and hopefully celebration.  This is going to be a day that will be remembered in our history and I plan on enjoying every minute of it.

As stay at home parents we are in a unique situation.  Our job takes place in our homes without the presence of bosses or coworkers.  Yes, we have friends and family, but really the only people who we really interact with in our jobs are our kids.  And the only outside person who really sees us in our jobs is our spouse.

This creates a lack of job performance recognition.  I have been feeling undervalued lately.  This is a rough time for us and although we are very lucky and blessed in our life, we are struggling right now.   

Although it is a lot of pressure, all the responsibility for lifting me up and making me feel valued and validated falls on my husband and this is a little much for him, I think.  Unfortunately, there is no one else to help carry this burden.  It is his to bear, and I am sorry for that.

I tried to give him an analogy to help him to understand.  I asked him to imagine that he went to work every day and no one there ever said he was doing a good job.  It would be awful for him, and I think that it helped him to see the reality of the situation.  This is our job and validation for being good at our job is just as important for us as it is for anyone else.

Unfortunately, now that I have spoken about it, we now struggle with how to provide me with the support I need without his compliments or statements sounding contrived and trite.  

The great thing is that we can have this conversation at all.  I feel very fortunate that I feel safe enough and loved enough that I can say that I need more from him.  That says a lot about the strength of our relationship.  Many don’t have this situation and live alone with all this.

There is this catch 22 about being a stay at home parent.   At least for me, i feel guilty if I complain at all.  I made this choice and I am very grateful for it, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t have hard days, days that I wish I could crawl into bed and not get out till next week.  When you have a job outside the home, you come home and discuss the things that are going well and the things that are hard at work.  But when I do, i feel guilty.  I feel guilty for not enjoying every moment with my children, guilty for complaining about a choice that has been a huge sacrifice for our family, guilty for wanting more for myself.  And in response I usually get the suggestion that I go back to work.

I don’t need to go back to work, I need two days by a pool with a foofy umbrella drink or ten.

It is impossible for those not staying home to fully understand the joys and trials that we face every day. There are moments of pure bliss and moments when you feel like you have completely lost all value and substance.  It is equally impossible for us to fully understand the stresses that working moms face trying to be and do it all and not feel like they are doing any of it very well.

The hard fact is that being a parent is hard.  It just is.

We need to support one another, husband and wife, parent and child, friend and friend.  We need to be compassionate and lift each other up and be there for each other, even if we aren’t all the same or make the same choices or parent the same way.  

Hugs and kisses and flowers and all that crap.

We are anxiously awaiting the arrival of our new couches.  They should be here between 1:30 and 3:30 today.

Of course, right in the middle of nap time.  Send your positive thoughts that Ian will get some sort of a nap today. I am hoping they call at 1:00 and say they are are on their way and then I can just keep him up until after they leave.   Here’s crossing our fingers.

Pella has also had a big day.  Since we are getting brand new beautiful couches, it goes without saying that Pella will no longer be invited to sit on them.  But, our sweet boy is big and bony (rotty x great dane mix) and needs someplace extra comfy to sit to preserve his joints.  He has also been spoiled his whole life with his own spot on the couch, which resulted in a ruined couch and seating for two.

Anyway, our spoiled pooch has just received in the mail today his very own dog couch.  We did much research and chose the Bowser Double Donut - Extra Large in Chocolate Bones.  Although quite spendy (much more reasonable in the smaller sizes), it received the best reviews for both dog comfort and durability.  I did read that it is not chew proof though, but we don’t have that issue.

Upon its arrival, Pella immediated layed down in it and has refused to move since.  He didn’t even let me fluff it up after taking it out of the box and so in the picture below his is all slumped down in the back of the bed, making it appear even more gigantic than it actually is.

Isn’t he sweet?  He is a happy camper and that is all I could hope for him in making this difficult transition.

Now, we all know where my politics lie, but I have to comment on this whole deal about Sarah Palin’s 100k wardrobe.

I really don’t see why everyone is making such a big deal about this.

I do see the hypocritical air of having such an extensive clothing allowance while preaching to everyone her down home flair and beating up Obama for being an elitist.  I don’t know many wives of Joe six pack that shop at Nieman Marcus.  

But with that said, I have a completely different take on this.  The Republican National Committee is a marketing machine.  Their job is to market their candidate to the best of their ability.  Sarah Palin looking flawless and representing their brand is a very important part of all that.  

They have spent a good amount of time and money on making her appear ultra polished and professional, while still looking simple and understated as to appeal to the broadest audience.

This was a cheap solution to a very significant problem for them.  They couldn’t very well put her up their in her hockey mom garb now could they.  And you don’t hear everyone complaining about the millions of dollars they spend every week on hate ads, voter suppression and racist propaganda (oops, did I say that out loud).

The ROI is through the roof on this investment and I think it is as simple as that.

And just as a reminder…

It still gives me chills.

My father in law was here this weekend and we were watching the baseball playoffs.  I am not a baseball fan so much.  I’m more of a basketball fan.  Don’t get me started on the Sonics.  I digress.

Anyway, we’re watching the game and the announcer says the name ‘Coco Crisp’.  I’m like ‘Woah Woah, what did he say?’ and my father in law is like ‘yeah, that’s his name’.

My first thought was ‘Who names their kid that?’ and then I started thinking about a girl I knew when I was a child.  A friend of mine had a little sister named Ginger Snapp.

I did find out that Coco’s real name is Covelli and that kids teased him as a child calling him Cocoa Crispies, but that when he started playing professional baseball, the name Coco Crisp just stuck (The Boston Globe).  Guess we can’t blame his parents for that one.

But, like my childhood friend’s parents, there are many who do name their children these things.  I can’t help but wonder why?  Are they trying to set their kids up to be teased and harassed their entire childhoods?  As a parent, I just can’t believe that is the case.  But then why?

Do you know or know of anyone with such a name or have any insight on what would drive a parent to choose such a name?  I would love to hear your take.